The almighty adventures of drugs and Johnlock
by RedSneakerShoes
Summary: A story by my best friend. The story of Johnlock and Mystrade and their adventures together. She claims it's a very serious story, but feel free to decide that for yourself. No drugs involved.
1. Chapter 1

My best friend wrote this. I promised her to upload it for her. I have nothing to with this. I just read and laugh. She's a precious.

* * *

yo fanfic

warning full homo

teller?: john jamelieas watson cullen, old, hates war, parents died in car crash when 6, feels like it's his fault, shy at first but really charming :*

as i walked into the apartment on baker street i found sherlock totally naked and woah my dingodog was too happ abuot htat and i got a *** crisis and sherlock laguehd and said wiht beautfiil voice like butte'

"u r so homo for me jawn" as he got off the flror and got closer

"ucant escape destiny" and when did shercok believ ein desinty?

then i coulnt stand his cheekbones anylonger so i jsut kissed him and we ended up having loud s'' and mrs hudson came in the next mornign and was like 'yo homos i know what u did man clean up jesus"

part 2

as i walked down the streat with ssherlocks hands in myne i smild becaus i was really gay now with hin and evyerbody knows

lestrade congratuated us a milians times toaly asking for a threesome but sherlcok donast shar

mycoft wanted us to get chedced for homostuff and we we waitng in lin iwthn suddnl i just had dto fcØ him so we cwnt on the bathrron and fucked (sherlock) :)

part 3

we wineti nto sherlocks room after bein totls clean of stuff and we realized tha he dint have a rael beadc so we wnet up to my rommn and i handcuff hinn reall chess to m bed ad he olty got turnd on by it bcusz hes a sociopath or sittnihgn

tne i ucked hinn again so gaay an non of us coudl walk (woah) :)

den ther wsa a casse of 4 murderd girls burt sherlc didnt careb cause he was too busy fucking me

then lestrade had to commn and get him and he alked in on us but it wasnyt awkward becau "i think lestrade is gay"

i sadi to sherlco

"iof ocurse he is"  
"but he is married sherlock2"

"jga"

"we hvae to help him he got dorughter" o

oh


	2. Chapter 2

mycroftxlestrade special 333

it was a lovely evenign somwher in hwat was supposd to england and sherlock and jawn was owver for thanksgivin dinner at Mycrofts secret location (even tho brits dont do thanksgivin?)

anyways

as they wrere talking about fullhomostuff somneyne knocked on the door and mycrof opned it and t here stood the most beautiful man ever

"hi im" hte strange man sadi and whent silentbecaus of mycrfots beauty

"lestrade wtf" said sherlock suddenl behind mycrof

"you'r.e... the lastrade?" mycp0ft whisperd. lstasrade saind nothign but mycroft knew waht he was thinking (instnat soulmates)

"u guys are homo ew duller" sherlc turned away to french jonh on the toilet 8loo)

"may i

come in?2 lsatrade said and lookd so handsome

"ofc" mycrof said faintyl looking at his ass all the way, letsadre was overwevlved by the house  
"Why ar u herE?" mycroft asked trid to hol his boo000hner back

"because fo you"

lstarde went clsoe to mycroft

"if i cant have sherlock"  
i put his hands on mycrofs sweet khaki pants (ass)

"I will have his brother"

CLIFFHANGER


	3. Chapter 3

HALLOWEEN SPECIAL EARLY BECAUSE WOHERE BANDCAMP

SUDDENLY WHEN HTE MYCROFT AND LESTRAD WAS HOLDING EACH OTHER ALMOS MAYKING OUT A LIGHTNING HIT SOMEHTING AND BAM

LESTRADE SCREAMED LIKE GIRL AND SHERLOCK CAME OUT OF THE BATHROOM WITH OUT HIS PANTS ON AND YELLED

"WHERE MURDER"

"NO SHERLOCK NO MURDE" MYCROT YELLED NANOYFED AOBUT HOW HIS BROTHER NOW JNWEW HOW GAY HE WAS LOL

"2SPOOPY OMG" LESTRADE HJELLEL

"LET ME TAKE U TO MY ROOM" HE SAID AND TOOK LESTDARES HAND

"I THINK ITS UP HERE" THEY WENT UP THE STAIRS AND ASID THE DID THAT SOMENE STARTED TO PALY THE VIOLIN

"SHERLOCK U DULLE R U DOIN THAT"

NO ANSWER

LESTRAD VERY SCARED SO MYCRFOT LEFT HIM ON HTHE HALLWAY BECAUES FUCK THAT SHIT HES NOT EVEN THAT IG AND WENT DOWN STAIRS ONLY TO FIND SHERLOCK LYING DEAD ON THE STAIRS

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOO" HE SCREAM

JOHN CMAE IN WITH BOOLOOD ON HANDS  
"NOOOOO" HE SCAREDM TOO

HORRIBLESO HORRIBLE

JOHN CRY AND GREW A MOURNSTACHE INSTANTLY

AS LESTRAD CAME BACK HE SCREAMD BECASUE OF THE HORROR OF JOHNS FACE THEN HE SAW SHERLOCK AND STARTED TO LAUGH

WHAT

WAAATATATT

SUDDNELY THEY HEARD THE VIOLIN AGAIN

"I THINK GUYS"

JOHN LOKOED AROUND  
"ITS SHERLOCKS GHOOST"

WAOOHOHOHOOHO

to be continued


	4. Chapter 4

HALLOWEEN PART 2

JANW WAS ASCARED ADN HSI MOURNSTACHE KEPT GROWIN AS THE VIOLIN PLAYED A SAD MELODY (something like justin biebers pray)  
den suddenly someone knocked on thse door and moriarty stepped insid dressd in a purple witch costume  
"I WILL CURSE U ALL" he yelld like moratity and then he did smothing with his wand and disspadread into thn air  
"well rthat was od" mycrof said  
"I thought moriarty was dead" said lestrade "Well so we thought aobut sherlock" john said mad and his mournstache was now alost touching the ground he waas crying

THEN SUDDENLY  
sherlocks body took a dep breath adn stood up all jackstyle  
"what happened?" sherlock said  
"u died"  
"did you kill me, joawn?"  
"no ofc not bby" john cried  
"why do you HAVE MY BLOOD ON YOUR HANDS" SHERLOCK YELLED AND LIGHTNENING OUTISDE  
everyon gasped excpet lestrade beausea he aint that msrat  
sherlock looked sad bescaseu jawn had killed him and so was johnwwaht. Mycroft suddnely screamd because how the fuck was sherlock alive with a knife in his stomach?  
"i swear i didnt kill you" john said and loked down. Sherlock took the knife out of his body and threw it awy. "WELL SOMEONE DID"  
"we'renot really asking the rrite qeustions how the fuck are you alive sherlock" said lestrade bored he just wanted to shag a holmes really dead or alive  
suddnely jowns mournstache turned into worms aedn he yelled "get them off me" and lestrade and mycroft was gone so there was only dead/alive sherlock  
"let me get that" he whispered with his beautiful voice and started to eat the worms off johns body it was totalyl hot

another palyce same time mycroft and lestrade was walking down the corridor of scaryness and it was really scary  
the rain was thick like lestrade (hot) and he was thinijign wabout how he woudldnt be able to come home

when johns mostache awas gone and sherlock and john was done fcking john said sto hserlock  
"im sorry" For what sherlock answerd  
"i did kill you" john looked sad. he had only done it because he was becoming jealous of him and lestrade "I meant to kill lestrade  
but  
i mistoken u for him"  
sherlock was very upset because he was only a dead body and he left in the rain


	5. Chapter 5

it was a very cold place and shrelc was on a very svary case with biker s and jawn was like raelly scared bcaus hes such a cutie ald litlle and fucking gay  
suddnyl while sherlock awas lickin daed body said he had seen it in docta who and he lokced hansome  
the biker messenger sais with big voice "no homo" and thrw a ballon at jawn  
"What was hta?" jawn said lookd at sherloc and shelck sitll licking body said he could taste somehting (he lie he lie)  
he lookd up from corps with beautiful eyes with the colours of the earth, which John would never be tired of looking into, even now, when he was standing on this beautiful spot surrounded by nothing but snow and the magnificent detective, it was only Sherlock's eyes that took his breath away.  
anysways  
sherlc took the abloon out of hawjn hand and put it into his mouth bcuase it was thte hing where u get a funny voiec out of it  
yeah  
then he spoke like a baby and janw started laughing really really loud and suddenly the snow started falling and the corpse was gone  
sherlock blamed john the way home


	6. Chapter 6

it was sa very rainny day and sherlock ahad jus gottne a case agin after a long braek (he fucked me for too long)  
it was sometign with a hotel and i though taht was really kinky so when sherlock got out of the hotelroom i took all my clothes on and threw meself at the big heartshaped bead

in the other end of se hotel sherlck was wwearing a hot red suit like those people who serve u ysh  
he was udnercover adn was walking around with an old camera taking picutrs of peoples asses  
hsi new hobbh he sayid

to be cintuiend


End file.
